i-v

i.
the air is heavy between us,
electricity forming in the darkness,
a storm building in the shadows of tomorrow, 
light reaching for us in our uncertainty -
dragging us relentlessly into
something we wish we could forget -
for the future hours only hold the
same restless wanderings of yesterday
and yesterday and yesterday and
tomorrow is but a repeat of harsh reality,
our world lost in a broken record;
a soul that has forgotten how to let go. 

ii.
silence wraps us up in coats of oblivion,
of memory, of brokenness, of fragmented realism,
gentle fingers pulling at wounds we have
long forgotten, numb acceptance - rather than
healing - blinding our receptors to the
pain that has become a part of us,
bound to our very souls, wrapped around
our fingers like a tether that refuses to be
brushed aside with the passing of time.

iii. 
there are milliseconds between each
breath we drag in, our words as temporary
as the smoke in our lungs, unspoken 
and misunderstood and just as damaging
as the haze in the air that we swallow,
mindless; oblivious to the fact that
we are killing ourselves under a guise
of what we've been told is living.

iv.
the world is turning, shifting, changing,
but we are lost in the stillness,
frozen in the exhale of summer;
hanging on the edge of a someday
as we wait for the season to 
catch up with the ever restless 
whisperings of our hearts that tell us
that where we should be is
anywhere but where we are. 

v. 
we are pulled into the daylight
kicking and screaming, forgotten 
dreams clinging to our consciousness
with stubborn desperation; tenacious hope;
and we are told that we are brave and strong
for simply refusing to be told what and who 
we should be by the world we have been
forced to live in -- but we know our own
fragmented souls and timid hearts,
and we still search for something to 
save us and make us feel alive again. 

//

personal / fictional chaotic ramblings at 2 a.m. // august 7th, 2017